*to the tune of Fresh Prince of Bel-Air – Yeah, google and Youtube that sucker*

Now this is a story all about how

My life got flipped, turned upside down

And I’d like to take a minute – just sit right there

And tell you how I became kidnapped and filled up with fear.

In the Northwest Steppes, I was killing some hawks

Near some damned gnolls, where I stole all their socks

Chilling out, maxing, relaxing all cool.

And all shooting some centaurs outside of school.

When a couple  of gnolls, who were up to no good,

Started making trouble in my neighborhood.

I got into one little fight

And my mom got scared

She said, “These gnolls are taking you to their damned Splitpaw Lair.”

I fought my way out and when it came near,

I took a couple of pictures for me to just share.

If anything I could say this terraporter was rare

But I said, “Nah, forget it, Take me the f*ck outta here”

I pulled up to a Bell about Seven or Eight

And yelled to my feet, “Yo Homes, Smell ya Later.”

Looked at my kingdom, I was finally there

To sit on my throne as the prince of the Lair.

——

Yes, this is a horrible rap. My muse, she is insane.